euphoria

cloud nine

its never been so beautiful

airy and blissful

each lemony day has been lace filled

and every moment creates an aesthetic euphoria 

happiness was never explained to me like this

no one ever said

that even the bad days

would be beautiful

in comparison to older days

what pure beauty you've given my soul

its the lovey dovey ooey gooey chick flick love

but multiply that by infinity

and sugar coat it even more than i did

the most wonderful thing in life

is this

you for me

you in this world

you loving me

you

the cloud above bliss

my heart is full
(its something i try to quit
and i'm not ever sure why
because its what i love
but here i am
again)
and as i said before
my heart is full
i always wished
for something beautiful
but i never imagined
it'd be this beautiful
darling, did you know
you've fixed every broken piece
you have lifted my soul
my heart you have filled
i have confidence
i only once dreamed of
you put the puzzle pieces together
and created a lacy heaven
for me
i am on the highest cloud
floating over pure bliss and joy
you are mine
nothing else matters so much
eternity with a man
better than my dreams created
eternity with my man
you, craig
my heart is full
because you filled it
with all its ever needed

home

delicate fingertips topple over my back
goosebumps raise over my skin
i'm home
the familiar echo of adoration
floods through my veins
i'm home

the rare kind

i smell like a home cooked meal straight out of my mother-in-laws kitchen. its a smell that intoxicates you with warmth and memories of laughter and a new addition to the family you've always had. as i  lay here in my gray bed, i am finding that my limbs are exhausted and my brain is slowing. my heart rate is rested and night owls - the rare kind that sleep - are beckoning for my companionship. its quaint. but my lover isn't yet in bed so my eyes cannot rest until i've snuggled him into his twitching sleep coma. for being a day of rest, i always feel so warn of exertion at the end of this day. its funny how little things like that pan out over the weeks.

it only gets greater

you sweep me off my feet when you catch me by surprise with your lips on mine, wrapping your arms around my body, taking me home. my heart begins racing as you whisper that you love me. you, my love, are the very definition of wonderful. you're beyond it. my clothes smell like you still and i can't stop myself from smelling them - smiling. when you run your hand up and down my back, or your hands on my hips.. i can't concentrate on anything else but how fortunate i am to be here with you right here. mine. soon, mine forever and ever. i wish you could feel how i feel at night when i think about you. or maybe, hopefully, you already feel the same. this love we are in is special. full of everything absolutely spectacular. i'm in constant awe of my luck and in a daydream when i look at the beauty of your face, body and heart. you've the sweetest heart the world will ever touch. and somehow, by some miracle you loved me enough to ask me to be yours for the rest of time. to think i'll spend the rest of eternity getting swept off my feet by your loving self is overwhelmingly, captivatingly incredible. i wouldn't change a thing. we won't change a thing. i don't know how it gets better than this, but they keep telling me it only gets greater.

become

my lips are still numb from this. quite honestly, it still feels like a dream most the time. am i really this lucky? this blessed? i am! today made me believe it even more than i already did. i'm in a state i've never been in before. the spirit has never been so strong. i know. i know. i know what i'm doing is right. i know the way i've chosen to live my life, mistakes and all, is the path laid out for me. i know that i have a bright future and that i have the potential to be someone apparently very incredible. its been brought to my attention that i will become someone far better than who i am now if i continue to press on in excellence. now that i think of it, i should try even harder, now. yes its overwhelming. its hard to believe i can be someone so grand - but if He knows i can do it - i'll believe it, too. its time to buckle up and become. really though..how did i get so lucky? me? little imperfect, boring me. wow. i'm still numb. my heart is still racing and i'm still caught up in the permanent smile and butterfly filled body. i know things couldn't be any more beautiful. how blessed am i?

november

hello, its been a while. and since the last time i've spilled, my whole world has changed. my dreams i've wished for and written so often about are coming true.
its november, i tell you.
november was beautiful last year because it introduced me to the love of my life. it scattered flowers on my path and introduced me to true, true lasting love.
this november will be even better - i'm putting a label on our love. we'll call it: forever. time and all eternity.
i am marrying my best friend. 
it is so overwhelmingly beautiful. to say i'm happy, thrilled or ecstatic doesn't do this emotion justice. i am in the perfect place, i just have to wait two more lovely months for the most raw, perfect perfection. it feels long -- but i'm spending the days leading up to that white day with him. so of course i'll be alright. you don't even understand how lucky i am to have him.
i've always been living the dream..and i'm now in the real good part. the icing on the cake. the cherry on top.
oh, november.

...

i can't wait until we don't have to say goodbye at night
        only goodnight.

so

i can't cry tonight
the glue on my eyes will run
regardless
i wish i could've poured it out for you
cups of salty tea falling down
don't ask why, please
it just feels right
i am settling in on cloud nine
and every emotion is nearby
crowding me with their strength
i'm so happy
of course its easy
to become overwhelmed
or so worried something will break
but i've found something concrete
something to believe in
wholeheartedly
i believe in us with all i can believe in
the big picture is what i try to focus on
the forever and ever part
the white moment that sparkles
starting a new chapter
binding two into one
tying a knot - the strongest kind
beginning a family
loving, overall
why wouldn't i be happy?

forever words

you make me excited
i smile bigger than i've ever done
i'm in love
and i'm in it deep
never been better, in fact
and things..
things are only getting better
growing stronger
tightly wound and binding
forever words
you left me breathless again
tonight as you walked away
i couldn't quit grinning
even after i closed the door
my mind kept traveling
to the soon months to come
how blessed am i?
wow
everything is perfect about this
i've never been more ready
i'm so in love

rambling comes easy when excited

there aren't words
but i'll give it a try

this is extraordinary
finally
the thing every little girl dreams about
from the time she can form a thought
is mine
the time has come
for certain, its in my hands
its real
everything is as beautiful as beauty comes
and its all mine for the taking
only small months and its set in stone
wow..

i think i've tried to act mature about this
like i'm used to this feeling
this intense, overwhelming sensation of excitement
but, come on
this is once in a lifetime
so i'm dropping that act
i'll let it show, now
no regrets as to how my heart is bursting
with every emotion
last night as i tried to sleep
i felt it stronger than ever
just how real this is
and just how anxious and eager i am

i'm ready, love
to take this on
hand in hand
my mind is in place
to prepare and get things done
all i need is you

still
there just aren't words
i'm too excited for such a limited vocabulary
i'm sure i'll always keep trying..

Change of Mind

I am comfortable with the thoughts, now. Ready, even. Or I will be, at least. I'm not ready, yet. Everything is falling into place and my heart isn't so insecure, anymore. Its...eager. I never thought I'd say that. Like you said, I'll have you - so its okay. I'm not worried. I'm not as awkward as I once created myself to feel. The storm settled over the clouds above this and I'm peaceful with whats to come. Patience is the game, again. For this, I won't complain. Yet, I suppose. But you should know you fixed my worries in that state of mind. We'll be fine, of course. Just like you said. You don't know how much those talks meant, dear. Is it selfish to admit I hope more will come? I do. The nerves still remain - they always will until the fears are faced, but besides that (normal) train of thought, you'll find me becoming more and more comfortable.

You do amazing things to my heart, mind and soul.

promise

don't look over your shoulder - thats only the past calling you back
it brought you here, it raised you, right
but tonight i'm praying you'll face forward
its these cryptic words i catch myself tangled in
effortlessly
don't hold the hand of the tempting one, there
i promise mine won't release the grasp
some things aren't destined to be broken
intertwined, forever
perfectly how life was intended to be lived
forget about what stops you
focus on what drives you to make Him proud
lose yourself in what you want
not what you think you need
sometimes your wants need satisfaction
but never lose sight of the bigger picture
remember those who'll never deceive you
never ask you to be anyone you're not
hold tight to this rope
anchor yourself to mine
we can float, together
just promise me you'll always stand proud
remembering how wonderful you are
to me
and to everyone you meet
something special beyond the dictionaries vocabulary
don't turn your eyes behind you
thats only what you know
its the unknown that really holds an adventure, anyway
jump in
face this lifetime with your chest held high
your eyes upward
and your smile brightly glowing 'cross your face

daydreaming

i dream about it every night, now

if not in sleep - daydream

quite honestly, it consumes my whole heart, now

its all i want

its what i work for

what i pray for every morning and night

when i think of anything

its that thought

wondering (patiently, of course) when the day will arrive

perfectly at the door to my forevers

i'm more in love than i knew possible

better than fairy-tales, romantic movies and novels about love

what we created is better

don't you agree, darling?

its night time, now

so goodnight my love

i'll dream of you, again, tonight

The Way

You're so good. The way everyone else's wants and needs are placed before your own. The way you have a passion for the people you love and care for. The way you have this stunning eye contact that sends my heart into paradise. The way you wrap your arms around my body at the exact time I need a hug, most. You're so good. The way you are so wonderfully perfect.

Pieces Eventually Make a Whole

Every time you go home
A piece of me you take.
But I know I'll be safe there, soon.
After all, all these pieces
Will someday make a whole
Bringing me there, next to you
Forever, if only.
Every day is one day closer
To the biggest day, you know?
I'll be patient
You'll be strong
And we won't give up
On this
Or each other.
You don't believe in Hollywood
So we'll make something better
While we build up this painting
Anticipating each tomorrow.
When you steal another piece of me..

i need you to fix me, again, love

seeds of insecurity are easy to plant
bravery seeds are harder
and i falter almost every time
accepting the fact that right now
i'm insecure

all i need to feel better
bluntly

is you

until the end of forever

and lucky for me
(and hopefully you feel the same)

...forever has no end

Forever Bells

The sound has been loud in my ears the past few months

I always ignored it

Because these are the moments I can't let myself bring up

Hoping, daily, you would

But take your time, I need to learn to be patient, anyway

In the meantime, you can find me with my head in the clouds

Forever bells ringing loud and clear

Promising me the future I've been wishing for

Simpler Love

You make me warm inside as you send chills down my skin

To put it simply, you are perfect

Simpler, I love you

Its why I call you my Love Bird

The best emotion and all this new freedom from everything I needed

I crave you

The feeling you give my heart is the feeling we're all meant to find

You're every single kind of perfect

Perfectly wonderful

And my happiness, hero and earthly angel

You keep me warm whilst the goosebumps rage on

While the fire still burns

Sparks fly

Simply, my love bird, I adore you

I love, love, love you

Real

It takes a real man, and the most ultimate kind of gentleman to let his girl know he loves her, even after he's had her a while.

It takes the very luckiest girl to get that kind of man.

Its a miracle I'm the girl who found that man.